Is it more important for me to correct their misstatements or to stay present and listen?
Would I rather be right or engage in genuine dialogue?
Am I judging or listening?
Learning to remain present and not get drawn into the right or wrong argument requires a willful intention to come out of the groove of an old habit. Typically, in a contentious discussion or argument defending oneself is a trigger reaction. We react defensively and then in turn blame or attack. This type of exchange seems mindless and bears little chance of success. Both people feel invalidated and the chasm between the two only widens.
Yet, even in the worst of adversarial encounters, there are a few charges that might make sense to us. However, our thoughts filter these out as we seek to bolster our argument and not detract from it. Having done so, we remain mired in the ping-pong match that takes us nowhere and invalidates one another. Read more
In recent years, I’ve treated increasing numbers of individuals who are driven to distraction through their pursuit of perfection. The desire to be perfect traps and burdens many people and imprisons them with unrelenting stress, often creating havoc in their lives. This is a very curious thing, given that these same people believe that seeking […]
If you struggle to change, here’s your path to break free. Having endured unimaginable, horrific, life-limiting circumstances for the better part of 2020, many of us are looking forward to the new year, with the promise of better times. New Year’s resolutions are calendar opportunities for self-renewal as we put the past year behind us and […]
Wednesday 05/13/2020 3:00 PM – 4:15 EDT This event will be recorded and sent to registrants Sliding scale fee: $30.00, $40.00, $50.00 To Register Join author, psychotherapist, and 2xTEDX Speaker, Mel Schwarz to learn about a path to resilience using oneness philosophies. What could be more essential in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic than […]