Is it more important for me to correct their misstatements or to stay present and listen?
Would I rather be right or engage in genuine dialogue?
Am I judging or listening?
Learning to remain present and not get drawn into the right or wrong argument requires a willful intention to come out of the groove of an old habit. Typically, in a contentious discussion or argument defending oneself is a trigger reaction. We react defensively and then in turn blame or attack. This type of exchange seems mindless and bears little chance of success. Both people feel invalidated and the chasm between the two only widens.
Yet, even in the worst of adversarial encounters, there are a few charges that might make sense to us. However, our thoughts filter these out as we seek to bolster our argument and not detract from it. Having done so, we remain mired in the ping-pong match that takes us nowhere and invalidates one another. Read more
Authentic leaders are by definition singular individuals. They possess a unique array of qualities and skills that enable them to lead others. Yet, we shouldn’t assume that these attributes are unattainable or too challenging to learn. Leadership skills are uncommon simply because we’ve received little or no education in this subject. If mathematics wasn’t routinely […]
I find it troubling that our inclination toward criticizing one another, particularly in familial or committed partnerships, overwhelms our ability to share approval or praise. Perhaps this is due to our cultural indoctrination toward finding fault and placing blame. Our societal proclivity toward antagonism and conflict regrettably surpass our potential for love and empathy. Nevertheless, […]
I’ve been struck by how often our words fly by each other without any real sincerity to them. Have you noticed how punctuated and meaningless our exchanges have become? We appear to have normalized nonsensical exchanges, bereft of any genuine meaning. Real intention, real inquiry, real caring has slipped into the ether as we verbally […]