Mel Schwartz, LCSW

#089 Act With Willful Intention

Join me in the 89th episode of The Possibility Podcast with Mel Schwartz as I critique the concept of gradualism and instead argue for catalyzing defining moments that help each of us realize our true potential and ultimate “human nature.”

Care to share your own breakthrough moments? Please leave a comment!

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Transcript of The Possibility Podcast with Mel Schwartz #089

Hello, everybody and welcome to The Possibility Podcast. I’m your host Mel Schwartz. I practice psychotherapy and marriage counseling, and I am the author of the book The Possibility Principle, the inspiration and the companion to this podcast. I’ll be introducing you to new ways of thinking, a new philosophy and a new game plan for life and all of the infinite possibilities that await you.

Hello, everyone, I’m going to be speaking today more from a philosophical perspective. And by the way, people don’t understand this psychology, psychotherapy is all dependent upon philosophy, how we look at things. Let’s start with the term human nature. I often hear the term human nature used in a negative, limiting or pejorative way. It’s not human nature, we believe human nature is to be competitive, to try to win to compete to take advantage of others basically unkind thoughts.

Well, how do we know that’s human nature, what if we were simply in the infancy or early adolescence of the human experience of growing in consciousness? Imagine looking at the behavior of a five- or six-year-old child and assuming that was it. That their growth and development were finished, and they would not mature any longer on any plane. And we then conclude that’s human nature. We didn’t know that that was simply adolescence.

What if we are just in our adolescence, and our nature has not been realized, because we again, have been playing from the wrong game plan for life. By now you’re very familiar with my perspective that we have operated for many different worldviews, none of which have enabled us up until this time to really start to access human nature. So I think that we’re just leaving human adolescence and poised for the first time to move into our nature. We should not mistakenly equate human habits with human nature. I think that we’re just now on the cusp of venturing forth to embrace our genuine nature. And that’s one thoroughly resonates and aligns with this wondrous participatory universe of inseparability, realizing this nature then allows us to touch on our true potential that ignites our personal transformative process.

Something that really really bugs me is this notion of gradualism, slow and steady progress. We accept that culturally as a, as a meme that misguides us slow and steady. You know, that approach may be beneficial if you’re running a marathon, but what’s the virtue in delaying our emergence our growth into our full participation with life.

I am opposed to gradualism in general and advocate for catalyzing your defining moments. Remember, a defining moment is a profound insight. When you look at yourself, or reality, or others differently, this distinct aha moment. Now, why delay your prospering, why not break through the harness that restricts you must slow and steady all at once you see, slow and steady over time probably means that we’re not getting anywhere.

You know, as you’ve seen by now, from listening to my podcasts, or reading my book, any instance of thinking differently, we open the floodgate of new possibility into our lives. I’ve worked with many people who have reached these breakthrough moments, and they’ve sustained them. That’s the core of a defining moment. If you don’t sustain the breakthrough, it’s not a breakthrough.

I’d love to show you my appreciation for your subscribing to and rating this podcast by offering you a gift to one of the following: The Power of Mind, a live talk that I gave, or one of my digital ebooks, Creating Authentic Self Esteem, Overcoming Anxiety, or Raising Resilient Children. And lastly, Cultivating Resilient Relationships. Once you have subscribed, please send an email to Mel at Mel Schwartz dot come. And just let me know which gift you’d prefer. Thanks.

Now how do you sustain the breakthrough? So it’s not just a moment, an hour or a day? Well, the way to sustain this defining moment is to keep your foot on the accelerator not slow and steady, full speed ahead. But still there’s a question Why do some people venture forth and really catalyze change, and others feel frustrated and don’t. And what can we do? What can you do to just quicken that personal unfolding?

Well, that leads me to the term willful intention. I’ve been giving a lot of thought to that. And you’ll find this in the epilogue of my book, The Possibility Principle. I believe that to access and manifest new possibility, obviously first requires your intention to do so. In my experience, many people indicate their intention, but they don’t take the necessary strides.

Intention alone, you see, doesn’t cut it. It’s insufficient to move forward. Intention needs to be coupled with will. Willfulness. Imagine you’re out on the sailboat at sea, you’ll hoist the sail, and that’s the equivalent of your intention to move. Without any wind. You’re not going to go anywhere, you’ll just drift. If you’re drifting through life, think of it this way. Think of the wind billowing through the sail as being commensurate with your willfulness. Typically, the word willfulness sounds pejorative, it speaks to someone’s stubbornness, or unwillingness to change directions. Yet, that is exactly the quality of resolve and determination that I am advocating for. What separates people who provoke change and seven new potential from those who continue the struggle is single minded willfulness, you need to infuse your intention with an unwavering conviction.

Think of an equation: intention plus willfulness equals your possibilities. When you integrate your new learning and skills and fortify them with a single minded, willful intention, you will be fully participating in your life’s experiences, and you’re navigate your own path. If you allow hesitation to distract you, you’re going to falter our core beliefs and our thought patterns instruct us as to our willful intention or lack of it.

You know, the expression why I can’t or why can’t I if you fall into the category of why I can’t just understand that’s your belief and thought, blocking intention, pay close attention to which camp your thoughts fall into. And if it’s why I can’t ask yourself, Where did this belief come from? By now, you know, the process that I’ve described, which I call wave collapses, those experiences in life which formed our belief, see the source of what’s holding you back? How is it that you came to think why I can’t and then just see it as an operating belief that you must release.

From this new participatory perspective that I introduced in my book, in which consciousness and the universe is one, the idea of immutable laws become strange, unacceptable, the universe doesn’t have laws, human beings made up laws. So how can we have laws of the universe. And these laws about human nature are akin to laws of the universe, there are no laws, laws are the creation of mind, nothing more, and nothing less. But then we take these manmade laws and we project them onto the cosmos, or on to human nature, if your life isn’t going sufficiently the way you want it to rethink it.

You know, the virtual rulebook of life has us protect what feels vulnerable, and it causes us to isolate and when rather than relate, connect and prosper the rules of life by which we’re living are failing us. If the operating rules for your life aren’t succeeding, why do you remain wed to them?

During halftime in the football game, if one team is down by 24 to nothing, you can rest assured the coach of the team that’s trailing during halftime will create a new game plan. That’s exactly what I’m encouraging you to do. The existing game plan of life results is so much despair and frustration that we experience. So we need to adopt a new strategy for life based upon these wondrous messages coming from the new sciences fit into nurture our human qualities, your new philosophy for life must be devoted into your emergence into your full participation and to the unfolding the becoming of your life.

To get there, focus on willful intention. Forget slow and steady and forget about all of this nonsense about human nature. Create your own human nature, through your own singular effort to live the life that you choose to live. Willful intention is the pathway to get there.

Good luck. Get on that road. Get in touch with me and tell me how it’s going. And until next time, and for always, I wish you a full wind in your sail, and all the willful intention you need to navigate and prosper in your life. Good luck to you, and you deserve it.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Possibility Podcast and I welcome your feedback on this or any episode. Please send me an email at Mel at Mel Schwartz dot com or leave a comment in the show notes for this episode at Mel at Mel Schwartz dot com.

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