Coming into the Edge
I was in the middle of a challenging stretch in a yoga class recently, when the instructor encouraged us to come into the edge. Move beyond the boundary of our comfort zone, was how I interpreted her coaxing. She was suggesting that moving to the edge of what our muscle memory was comfortable with, would propel us into physical if not spiritual growth. Coming to the edge in yoga provides the body with a new or forgotten experience. As we age our bodies tend to mold into habit and conformity which leads to a constriction of our physical being. Clearly, stretching into some new flexibility seemed wise. I reflected that this was also precisely what we need with our thinking...
Why We Struggle in Our Relationships
From my experience, a relationship that goes unscathed and unchallenged is the notable exception. Conflict and struggle become ordinary facets of our partnering. What often begins as a loving and intimately connected partnering tends over time to wither and fall from grace. It is rather a common denominator that relationships are a challenge for almost all of us. We might well consider why that is the case...
Transcending the Epidemic of Anxiety and Depression
Tens of millions of people in the United States suffer from anxiety and/or depression. The enormity of these numbers suggests that we are dysfunctional at levels that usher in a new norm, one of mass disquiet. This malaise has indeed reached epidemic proportions. Given that, we might well reconsider the very nature of this phenomenon. Millions of individuals spend billions of dollars on psychotherapy and medication, which generally fall well short of alleviating the problem. Our society is rapidly turning into a drug addicted culture, albeit by prescription. Yet, no one is asking why this epidemic is occurring. Therein lies the greater problem...
Overcoming Anxiety & Depression
A newly referred client came into my office some months ago and shared with me that she had struggled with anxiety her entire adult life. She had been in therapy with the same person for well over six years and had made little progress. I inquired as to what she had learned from their work together. If I actually had hair on the back of my neck, it no doubt would have stood straight up upon hearing her response. "He told me the best that we could do we be to try and manage my anxiety," she offered. So many mental health professionals are literally trained to believe that matters of anxiety and depression can at best be managed, and often with the associated medication to achieve the lessening of symptoms. This speaks to their mindset of pathology and the absence of a deeper understanding of the relationship between thought and anxiety or depression. The limitations of such a worldview are limiting and produce a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure...
Defining Moments
From time to time, most people tend to experience an occasional insight. An insight is simply the ability to change our filter and look at things differently. In moments of insight, there's a sudden burst of clarity where there had previously been static; there is an epiphany of movement. It's the AHA moment. When we are firmly entrenched in our beliefs and rooted in our certainty, we're not typically open to insights. To have an insight we need to at least temporarily suspend our beliefs and open to new possibilities...
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